Survival instincts have your best interests – but need a relook and re-analysis:
Your instincts will help you survive your problematic situation/trauma at that time – but they also cause symptoms that are detrimental and need to be looked upon and analysed – so you can make the calibrations to get you out of the damage control mode that is actually doing you more damage now, post facto. In trying to help you survive that situation – you got caught in another – that needs to be addressed.
I believe in science and how it impacts your emotions. Two very opposite things. Science and emotions. But when you get the connection – that emotions and science are linked – especially your own biology – your own body’s organs and their functioning, your brain and its processing, your neural circuitry and its rigidity or changeability – then you understand that – every emotion and every instinct in you – has been to survive. Whatever the trauma felt by you, it has been dealt with in the most instinctive way possible that helped you at that time. It might not have been a beneficial way in the long run, but it made you survive the trauma and come out of it at the time. Now that you are out of it – you have to do the analysis in hindsight and in a neutral way break all trauma-elements down and see – that what worked then is not working now. Now it is time to do the extra hard work of walking back to your real core self – and not the self you created to survive. Not the self that is hijacked by emotions and low self-esteem and confusion.
See the larger picture:
The good news is that – the biology of your body – the science of it – knows how to do this. The emotions, lows and mood spirals you thought were rigid and tough to get out of – your body’s biology knows how to eliminate these and kickstart a new self-discovery and response-process. It knows how to go to combat with these emotions and come out victorious. So do not get stuck in the side effects of the emotions that have taken centre stage. Push through these and see the larger picture which is:
- Your survival instincts will make you get through your worst time
- Your emotions will overpower you
- Your body’s biology gets impacted by these emotions but it is super resilient and knows how to eliminate trauma-elements and emotions
- Your self-work will give your body’s biology the shift it requires and is waiting to get – and will reflect it in physical calm and peace within you in the face of triggers
Why this emotional pain in the first place?
In your worst most difficult times, work is being done within you – behind the curtains, to move you and push you through to higher levels to connect with your true self. It is through these times of deep emotional pain that your karmic sediments are dissolved and you are transported to the awakening of your true sense of self. The path is rough and unknown and scary, but it leads you to acceptance of self and self-mastery. It is then that you see that the trials and tribulations that you faced – were important catalysts in your growth. Without these exact sequence of events, lifetimes of work would be left undone. So, even though you suffered, you did a lot of work – and you should know that.
There is a you that is required in this world as you are. As Source made you. Which exists right now, underneath the impressions and imprints layered above. That is the you which connects with the true self and with the abundance and glory of love, of having, and of being.
But till you get yanked out of your comfort zone and do the work – you will not connect with that and will see it as ‘suffering’ or ‘emotional struggle or something is wrong with me.’
The same survival instinct also inadvertently caused the pain. It did what it needed to help you at that time. Once you survived that time, another set of emotions took over. This is what the work is now for you. To see these emotions that keep you stuck. To work the layers of lifetimes to allow your body’s biology to reveal to you – the necessary path needed for acceptance of self and understanding your purpose. The linking of the suffering with your physical self that leads to the realisation of your true self. The self that is Source itself and your emotional pain is the prerequisite for this alignment.
Rejection and failure are catalysts – Your change agents – Your messengers:
Rejection in career. Not achieving what you thought you would. Not getting that recognition or fame. That car or that promotion. Not making the money you wanted.
Rejection in love. The grind of love bringing you to your knees. Or always searching for that love but not getting it.
Being raided by feelings low self-esteem. Or not addressing the underlying problems for fear of what might be unearthed. Thinking that what is left unmuddied is better than roughing up the mud and then getting ‘stuck.’ Or just being at a plain dead-end. A place where you feel uninspired or unmotivated to even change the status quo of lethargy. Perhaps plastering a mask of partying and exuberance to avoid dealing with the stuff underneath.
All of the above – are all symptoms. These are not the diagnosis.
And ironically enough – both these terms scaring the crap out of you to address whatever is going on in your life.
Here’s what I have to say.
The patterns of self-doubt and confusion about not knowing your calling – are the catalysts and messengers that need to be listened to. These are the nudges that are trying to get your attention to a larger meaning of your life that you have ignored thus far.
It will continue. The discontent and unrest within you – till you stop and listen to the message carried by these life situations.
Suffering is the key that opens the vault to self:
If you are alive – then you have carried forward karmic sediments and survival instincts that need to be worked upon and balanced so that the upleveling of your being can transpire.
Hence, the suffering of rejection (ego, betrayal, isolation, failure, confusion) is a very important and mandatory step that cannot be bypassed on your way to your higher self.
But often – all the symptoms are feared. All the steps are avoided. All the layers are kept tucked away. All the heavy feelings are not listened to.
All the requirements are present in your life right now. All you have to do is take the bold step to look at and identify the exact feelings and work with those. Own those. Wear them proudly. Each one of them. They have been your growth and your evolution.
There are reasons your reactions to them are the way they are – and that is the work that you have to do.
Do the work:
Ask these questions:
Q1. What was my trauma and shock and what was my survival instinct?
Q2. What emotions did I get stuck in?
Q3. How many years have I been stuck?
Q4. What would I want instead of this place of stuck?
Q5. What are my physical symptoms of these emotions?
Q6. What 3 new steps come to mind to shift routine that shift my biology?
Q7. Write a log for 3 months of your 3 new steps and if you see a shift or not?
Your survival instincts will make you go to the old impulses and actions that you learned and are most comfortable doing. But resist that and use this formula below to act on your 2nd deliberately calibrated impulse.
Use this Formula:
Look at your 1st reaction as if you are watching yourself in action. Act on 2nd response.
My 1st go-to response (old behavior) – Stop/look at it
My 2nd deliberate calibrated response (new behavior)
Views expressed above are the author’s own.
Views expressed above are the author’s own.
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